I slapped myself across the face hard. It helped enough, and I opened another tab, pulling up Youtube. I needed something to keep my mind focused where it needed to be. With effort, I typed in One into the search bar, pulling up the Metallica song. The guitar riffs started, and the fog retreated from my mind again with the thought of Jordan.
Going back to my messaging tab, I finished my password. The beauty of it was that it never would work again, and unless you knew the encryption key, you couldn't guess the next password in the series. Hitting enter, I hoped I had a few more minutes. Just a few more.
The screen pulled up the messaging tab, and I remembered that Vladimir told me Francois had sold me out. I couldn't message him, so who could I trust?
"A boy can always trust his mother,” I whispered as I typed out my email quickly.
This is Felix. I’m being held captive by a man named Vladimir and a woman named Svetlana. Not good, at the thought of her name, I could feel the fog start to wash over me again. Russian Mafia? I’m being held in . . .
Wait a moment, where the hell was I? I opened another tab and did a quick IP address ping, giving me at least a city and country. Dnipropetrovsk, Ukraine. Please, they’re brainwashing me. I need your help. Cannot trust Francois. I don’t know how long I can hold on.
The control Svetlana had instilled in my brain struggled to reassert itself as the music faded, and I fought back, chanting to myself. "Jordan . . . Jordan . . . Jordan . . .”
Tell Jordan I love her. And that I want to hear her play for me again.
With the last of my will, I closed the tabs, and set the computer back. If someone gave the computer a cursory once over, they wouldn’t know what I'd done, not without going into log files that I didn't have the time to erase.
Closing the laptop, I hurried from the room. I was halfway down the stairs when a voice came up to me. "Pet? What are you doing up there?"
"I'm sorry, Mistress," I said. "I had to find a toilet."
My lie wasn't convincing enough. "No Felix, you were up to something else. What were you doing?"
I struggled, and only by repeating Jordan's name to myself was I able to not tell her. I knew once the fog of her control came over me fully again, I'd not remember that well anyway. All that was important was Mistress Svetlana, and that I'd been a bad pet. I only had to hold out a few more minutes. "Nothing."
"Liar," she said, then sighed. "I shouldn’t have rushed you, letting you in the house before you were trained enough. My mistake. But, like any pet who’s let into the house too early and then makes a mess, it’s easy enough to correct. Sacha, please.”
The guard, who I'd never exchanged words with, stepped out of the shadows behind Svetlana, his ever present rifle in his hands. "Yes, Miss Svetlana?"
"Take my pet back to his container. It’s supposed to be cold tonight, so make sure that he has an extra blanket . . . and give him one of those small electric space heaters. Nothing too powerful. We’ll see to the rest of his punishment in the morning."
"Yes, Miss."
She pointed, and my head dropped. I walked down the stairs, following her gesture. As I passed her on the stairs, she held up her hand to stop me. "I'm disappointed in you."
Tears came to my eyes and I nodded. "I'm sorry."
She stroked my cheek, a small smile on her beautiful lips. "I know. And if you take your punishment well, this will all be forgotten."
Sadness was replaced with something at her words, and with a spring in my step, I followed Sacha down the rest of the stairs. She had, in her infinite beauty and kindness, taken away my sadness, and replaced it with hope.
Chapter 32
Jordan
I woke up in the morning, sighing in mixed disappointment and contentment. The night before, Francois and I had made love again, something that was becoming more and more frequent after the memorial ceremony. In the week since the event, we'd made love almost every night, Francois not even worried when I cried afterwards.
As usual though, I woke up alone. His new duties had him busy from nearly sunrise, although he made it a point to be finished by mid-afternoon in order to have family time. Rolling over, I stretched my arms over my head, relishing the feeling of languid exertion. I was still lower in weight than I'd been before Felix was taken from me, but I was coming back.
Climbing out of bed, I pulled on pajamas and walked out into the main room of the house, expecting to see Charani cooking or cleaning. Instead, for the first time in a long time, Syeira was up and looked active. "Jordan, we have to talk," she said urgently.
"Of course. What’s up?"
She shook her head. "Come with me."
"What for?" I asked. She leaned in and in her eyes I could see something I hadn't seen in a very long time. Excitement. Hope. “What?”
“Felix. He is alive.”
Chapter 33
Felix